NFL

The Dallas Cowboys are Finally Healthy and Ready to Demolish the Rest of the League

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For 31/ 32 NFL teams, today is an absolutely awful day. The Dallas Cowboys are finally healthy. For the first time in what seems like an eternity, the boys will be playing with Amari Cooper, CeeDee Lamb, Zeke, Dak, D-Law, and a full O-Line. The rest of the league thought this team was slipping, but in reality, none of the fellas were ever on the field together! Take away about 5 of any team’s top 10 players and see what happens.

We’re gonna ravage the Saints tonight. Completely destroy them. Absolutely embarrass those dorks in their own building. In 100% seriousness, Trevor Simeon might get sacked 500 times tonight. Micah and D-Law coming after you? If Taysom Hill gets in he better pray to the Mormon gods that he doesn’t get blasted all the way back to Jesus with this D-Line coming after him.

Offensively, the boys are freaking back. Ceedee, Amari, and Gallup. When’s the last time we had that? We’re obviously gonna score 40+ on this garbage Saints defense, but they honestly might not make a single tackle. I wouldn’t be shocked if Dak throws for less than 1 incompletion tonight.

Now, the boys are -6 tonight, and I’d love to tell you to throw your children’s Christmas gift money on that, but I, unfortunately, cannot advise that. Book it with Trent is on Cowboys -6. So…. just don’t touch it.

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Noah Gagnon

19-year-old student. MMA Enthusiast. 2014 Bedminster Middle School Boys Mile Run Second Place. BJJ White Belt. Kind Guy.
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