Obviously I’m too stupid to talk about this “gas shortage” but I am just fat enough to talk about what really matters. The Chick-Fil-A Sauce shortage is something that needs to be brought to the front lines of the media. It seems as though the government is creating this “gas shortage” to create a diversion from us. I will not be duped however.
Chick-Fil-A is now limiting the amount of sauce that each customer is allowed to have. I don’t want to live in a world where I have to ration out the amount of Chick-Fil-A sauce that I get for each meal. I am in the camp that says I should be able to obtain as many sauces as my jolly cholesterol filled heart can handle!
I’m not sure if this stems from Chick-Fil-A beginning mass distribution of their signature, Chick-Fil-A sauce, and their Polynesian Sauce. However, don’t play with my emotions like this. I know Chick-Fil-A will be fine and will totally recover from this but the hysteria the media drives is insane and people will inevitably freak out and go fill up grocery bags of sauces. Honestly, fuck it. I want that, I want dumb assholes running in and out of Chick-Fil-A restaurants with gallon trash bags filled to the brim in avocado lime ranch.
In summation we can all take a little step back and realize that we are actively over reacting to anything the media tells us. Stop believing everything we read and let things take action before we go out and inevitably run through our crude oil supply because twitter user, “ILoveGunsandPussy_69” told you too.