FREE: De Fries vs Kita Live Stream Free: KSW 57 MMA Full Fight on December 19th. For KSW Heavyweight Champion Phil De Fries, 2017 marked the start of an impressive career resurgence. A resurgence sparked by the recognition that for years, he’d been suffering from undiagnosed, untreated anxiety.

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I suffer from anxiety extremely badly, but it wasn’t until 2017 that I started getting treatment for it,” England’s De Fries (18-6, 1NC) told Cageside Press ahead of his return this weekend, in the main event of KSW 57. “I realized it had been holding back my career my entire life.”

If there was a watershed moment, it came perhaps after a bad loss that year, and the realization that “my life was insane.” After the loss, the former UFC heavyweight “hit the drink,” as he put it. At work, De Fries would worry that he left the stove on. If he left the house, he’d repeatedly return home to ensure that he’d locked the door. Or he’d panic while at work that he’d left the dog out in the cold.

“All of a sudden, I was like ‘this is not normal behavior. You’re living an insane life here. This is not normal,” explained De Fries. “I didn’t even know what anxiety was until I googled it. I thought, ‘you’ve got anxiety Phil.’ I wish I’d learned it sooner.”

Once De Fries recognized what anxiety was, and that he was suffering from it, it quickly became apparent that it had impacted his career as a fighter.

“I’ve always been a killer in gym,” said De Fries, who noted that he’s trained all over the world with some of the best fighters in the sport. “In the gym I’ve always been a killer. But when I would come to fight, I would kind of fall all the time because of the anxiety. But now that’s sorted. Now I’m a killer in the gym and in the cage.”

For a championship caliber fighter to openly admit to anxiety in a sport that prides itself on tough guy mentality is both courageous and commendable. Mental health struggles have always carried something of a stigma with them, especially for men. And especially in the sporting world. Talking about his anxiety isn’t something De Fries would have been able to do prior to getting treatment. Today, that’s a different story.

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