As you can see the video on TMZ, Hall of Famer (and greatest defensive back in history) Deion Sanders had his car broken into this morning by someone driving a “white suburban” in the very early hours of the morning.
According to Sanders, “I’m a little disturbed,” Deion said in a video message this week. “Because the boombox has a sentimental value.”
What the hell is wrong with people? Who steals a boombox in 2021? I am positive there was a myriad of other items you could have possibly stolen from Deion Sanders that had immediate monetary value, and you chose to hold his boombox at ransom? Who does that?
Admittedly for myself, I am a Deion stan, and had no idea how down to earth and awesome he was until he made the leap to Barstool. Ever since we have all been able to see him interact with the common man, you can’t have anything but love for this once in a generational level athlete. Completely respectful, and cool in a way that you can’t teach to another individual; similar to a mole in all of the wrong places, or a birth mark you just can’t seem to hide, this dude is born with it. Weird analogy, no? Similar to a teenage girl giving a handy for the very first time, I tried my best.
Any who, back to Primetime’s little incident this morning. I would imagine that if you are in possession of such a boombox, you’d have zero clue what to do with it, but since you are already a braindead moron, that is pretty much a given. I would jump on the mercy of Prime, and anonymously drop it off at his ranch somehow, and return what is rightfully his, as it has zero value on the streets (or at least I would imagine, I haven’t much upped my certification in contemporary thug microeconomics, so I could be wrong).
Any enemy of Prime, is officially an enemy of myself. Give him back his fucking boombox.
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