BREAKING: I am Snacking Girl Wins TIME Person of the Year

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Wow. What a monumental occasion. For the first time in human history, a young lady so influential that none of us actually know her name has taken home the TIME person of the year award. Mark Zuckerburg, Pope Francis, Barack Obama, Donald Trump… I am snacking girl. Now one in the same.

Why did Mrs. Snacking take home such a prestigious award? In her infamous TikTok, this young lady truly encapsulated a feeling that constantly persists in us all — a desire to snack. You watch that video and you think to yourself “you know what? I could go for some cheetos, pringles, or ramen right now. Perhaps some chicken nuuuuuggggeeeetttsss.”

What was she craving? What was she craving? Tasty treats and various yummables. What did she get? Recognized as one of the most influential young ladies 2020 had to offer, and a very angry Barstool Sports comment section. A true queen, and a deserving recipient of TIME person of the year. Snack in power, queen.

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Noah Gagnon

19-year-old student. MMA Enthusiast. 2014 Bedminster Middle School Boys Mile Run Second Place. BJJ White Belt. Kind Guy.
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