This past Wednesday, Pro Sports Extra’s eight-team fantasy football league held its draft. The commissioner of the league is Nate (aka NateDog – who also has a team called NateDog Squad – a very boring name). This is a very important thing to remember.
Leading up to the draft, I began getting into the zone. I was laser-focused and developing massive tunnel vision. With my eye on the prize, I competed in mock drafts and began mapping out my draft strategy, weeks in advance, and running through scenarios.
It isn’t exactly public knowledge, but I’ve had a lot of success in fantasy football. I’ve won the championship in numerous leagues, including winning two of the last 3 leagues the last season I played (I was the runner-up in the third league). Has NateDog the Commish been researching this information? Don’t call me a conspiracy theorist, but the pieces to the puzzle are starting to fall into place by now.
So, I join the draft room on Wednesday night and immediately notice I’m drafting sixth. Which pretty much sucks in an eight-team league. Then with just over nine minutes before the draft, I notice that NateDog the Commish coincidentally has the first pick in the draft.
I immediately called NateDog out, and he responded by – well, look for yourself.
My observation picked up momentum in the draft chat, and he returned before the draft began to a lot of questions. Only he didn’t have any answers, other than to rub it in that he had first pick.
After the draft is over, I realized that I play confirmed cheater NateDog the Commish in week one. Yahoo is projecting the cheater to win by less than three points – not a bad draft for sixth.
After drafting Philadelphia Eagles tight end Zach Ertz, I changed my team name from #CancelBradShepard to the apropos “My Ball Zach Ertz”.
It is now my destiny to defeat NateDog the Cheating Commish in week one. It is my life purpose. Whatcha gonna do Nasty Nate, when My Ball Zach Ertz runs wild on you, brother?