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Pray For All the Dudes With Girlfriends in This Town That These Two Cowboys Now Own

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When you were a kid, you held a baseball bat and pretended it was the bottom of the 9th with 2 outs in the world series and you hit the game winning homer. When an MLB player wins the world series, they often break into tears telling the interviewer “how this was all just a dream when I was kid, but now it actually happened.” It happens literally every time. But for the rest of us unathletic, desk-jockey losers, this dream is just that­­— only a dream.

But for these two cowboys (in what I assume HAS to be Texas) their “bottom of the 9th” moment came for real amongst their screaming townsfolk today. Absolutely flawless execution with the roping and takedown in the middle of the street. Doing so avoided bodily harm and some big ‘ole dents to the trucks and cars parked on the road. Police? What police? This town has these guys.

Granted, it was probably their longhorn that escaped in the first place. I mean when you think about it, it’s a little suspicious why they were horse and lasso ready right away. But who cares? “Look good, feel good. Feel good, play good (in a cowboy hat).”

They might be arrested for terrorism via cattle-run, but the Police were cucked so hard by these cowboy studs that they can’t do anything about it now. All that really matters now is that they got this viral video showcasing their heroics that they’ll undoubtably show every girl at the bar for the rest of time (and no one was hurt, I guess).

There is not a door wide enough in that town that can fit these guys puffed chest and wide shoulders now. If the video continued, I bet there was torrential downpour of bras and women’s underwear flooded around those two modern-day John Wayne’s and the tamed beast.

If you had a girlfriend or wife in that town, you certainly don’t anymore. Time to move to a new town and start a new life, fellas… because there is no topping that. Today was a victory for cowboys and western sports everywhere. 

 

 

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